Sporadic blogger, Miss Marly Walker reporting for duty.
I haven’t blogged in a while as life and health have gotten in the way of allowing my mind to properly ruminate on…life. Ironic that. Both the fiancé and I have been sick, to put it mildly, as this winter has been quite unkind. However, we are both battling through and considering the future ahead of us, it’s just a minor blip on the radar, really.
Anyway, before I get onto any particular subject matter a quick recap of July and the beginning of August is in order.
As you are all aware, I’m getting married next month and preparations are well under way for the upcoming nuptials. Our engagement party last month was quite the success with my social skills being put to the test. I managed to hold my own and not be too overwhelmed by it all. Though once everyone left I did heave a big sigh of relief.
Not that I didn’t enjoy everyone being there. I just needed to recharge afterwards. Such is life for an introvert.
This winter and cold and flu season has been quite unkind to me, as I mentioned above; even now I am still nursing a bad cough.
Work has been hectic, especially being punctuated with time off from being sick. It’s hard to believe that the centre has been open and operating for over seven months now. I am absolutely loving it still. The children are such a joy and the staff…my work family are amazing to work with. The support we have for each other is something I do not take for granted and I am always willing to give that bit extra just for the joy of it.
That may sound trite, but it’s honestly the way I feel.
On a more trivial matter. Simple Plan. They’re ramping up the anticipation what with hints of a new music video and playing a new song on an awards show. Boom! To say I’m excited for their new album is probably an understatement. But, I’m under stating it as my excitement levels for that really can’t be compared to the anticipation I have for my wedding. The latter totally eclipses the former. So much so that I still don’t really feel it. If that makes sense.
I held my bouquet the other day. And…I cannot describe the feeling deep inside me, but I was dancing for joy internally. I mean, sure a wedding is just a ceremony that lasts a moment. However, it marks an important point in one’s relational journey.
Mark and I spoke the other day about how we think it makes sense to get married earlier in the relationship and then to grow together, committed to each other and learning about each other more and more. Rather than getting to know each other and then getting married and realising you’ve already done everything you wanted to do together and it’s just going through the motions.
Marriage isn’t a destination, it’s a journey.
Wow. That was profound. Even for me.
That makes me think for a moment to why I even want to get married. And sure, once upon a time my stock standard answer would’ve been, because it’s just what happens, right?
But, now? Well, it’s because it’s what I really want. I want to share my life journey with someone that I can trust every little thought every little speed hump, every battle, every victory, every moment with. I want to share it with someone who gets me and at the same time wants to invest the time to get to know me even better. I want to share life with someone who I want to do exactly the same for.
And the wedding? That’s where we get to publicly declare our commitment to each other in front of the people who matter in our lives. And before God.
And, yes, I want the white dress and the little church and my dad to hand me over to my fiancé. I think that’s just absolutely beautiful.
So, marriage, a journey. And one that I am looking forward to with much anticipation, and some nervousness. Which is normal. Nerves prove that you are alive. And that is always a good thing, hey?
Anyway, on that subject….lets now change it.
Now, I suppose you’re wondering why I’m writing about my name. Well, for a few reasons. First, I find names fascinating; second, since my surname is going to change I thought I’d talk a bit about that and what I think it all means to me. And third, I already had one name change in my life as I was adopted into my family.
So, I’ll start with my name now. Marly Catherine Walker. I am a Walker by adoption, and Catherine is from my mother’s side of the family. Incidentally, once I get married, my initials will remain the same. MCW. Convenient, much?
There isn’t really a definitive definition of the name Marly. It all depends on where you look. In some places it says it is derived from the old English ‘Marlowe’ which means ‘lake meadow’ and on the other it is a place name in France. Whatever the derivations I think there was only one main reason my parents chose that name for me, and it is that it sounded similar to my Chinese name: Man Yi.
Makes sense, yes?
Anyway, pretty easy name, right? Well, apart from the fact that almost everyone writes it with an ‘e’. Haha. Sometimes I joke that I should just change it to ‘Marley’ for convenience. But, Marly is my name and it belongs to me.
As do all my nicknames, though often nicknames belong as much to the people who created them. And I’ve surprisingly had quite a few over the years. Though the ones that have stuck are Bob and Marlz/Marls.
The others include: Mars Bar, Big Marlz, Chung Yummy Beans, Pluto, Marlzbean, Mars, Moolaa. Some of them have cropped up again in my own usage for online usernames, which is another set of names that define me in some way or another. But the two that I want to talk about are Bob and Marlz.
Back in Year Six when I was on school camp, the other year six teacher, not my own, just started calling me Bob, for no apparent reason at all, except that was just his nature. I don’t think I’ve told many people that it was a teacher who came up with that nickname. But, now anyone reading this will know. Haha.
Then there’s Marlz. Considering my name is already short, it’s not really a matter of shortening it like you would with other names. So, Marlz just stuck. I think it’s just an Aussie thing. As much as Gary becomes Gazza, Barry becomes Bazza, Beryl becomes Bezza and Murray becomes Muzza. So, Marly became Marlz. And that’s it. Not really profound.
Anyway, I didn’t really mean to talk about my nicknames.
In just over a month, I will no longer be a Walker. So, I will have to start the process of changing all documentation to reflect that.
The wife taking the husband’s name is to me a symbol of how the two become one in a marriage. I will become part of a new family, a new partnership. And that means so much to me.
It’s interesting to note even in this day and age of extreme feminism, women are still happy to take their husband’s name. Though I have also seen more women who keep their own name or even hyphenated family names. I don’t know if there has been any statistical change in this, and it would be interesting to find out. But, I personally could never imagine even wanting to keep my maiden name or hyphenating my name. I mean, really… “Withey-Walker…or Walker-Withey”… That’s just weird. Too many ‘ws’ for one thing.
I’m not sure where I’m heading with this blog post to be honest. It started off as a recap of the last month or two and ended with names.
So, perhaps I will leave you with a couple of thoughts that I haven’t brought up already in this post.
Live life with a child-like appreciation.
I think as adults we sometimes allow everyday life to get in the way of actually just appreciating what is around us. Children don’t let the world get them down. They explore the world with open minds and open hearts. They sing out loud, not caring if people watch them, unless they revel in it. It’s not until a well-meaning adult tells them that they should stop and not draw attention to themselves that they realise or think that it’s a problem.
By that token…
Sing whenever and wherever you want…
For me, breaking out into song is natural. As natural as breathing. Song is everywhere, music and rhythm is in all of life, in all of nature, in our own heartbeats. Sing a new song in your heart. It will always be worth it.
If you got through this mini essay I give you kudos.